90-Day Life Challenge: 6 Vacation Habits I Intend To Keep

We just got home from a 5-day whirlwind vacation. It really was nice to get away a little bit, but there was just too much going on at home and work to truly relax. Nevertheless, I fell into a few vacation habits that can be easily carried home with me.

Do Not Check My Phone Right Away

In fact, I didn't check my phone for nearly an hour after I woke up. It wasn't even strange after the first day. This doesn't mean that my first hour of the day wasn't productive--quite the opposite. My mornings generally began by making my coffee and sitting down to enjoy a book chapter or a random Wikipedia article, something to stimulate my mind and tune out the world. Then, I spent some time exercising (walking, stretching, light calisthenics, and yoga). And finally, I ended the "me" time with a brief pamper session in which I washed my face (including a face massage), brushed my teeth, fixed my hair/make-up, and dressed for the day. It wasn't on purpose, but I stumbled on a beginning to my morning routine.

Tidy As You Go

This is pretty self-explanatory, but basically, no one wants to clean up on vacation. To avoid needing to do much cleaning, I just picked up after Wee-One any time we switched activities. I also broadened the general tidying to include straightening the pillows when I got up from the couch, replace decorative table items if I moved them during meals, and sweeping up minor messes immediately. There was so much less cleaning to do at the end of the day so I never really felt like I stopped my day to clean up.

Shower Your Family With Attention And Praise

Since I was eager to "chunk" all of my work tasks into small blocks of time during our trip, it freed up a significant amount of time for focusing on my family. For Wee-One, it meant that I savored the time, encouraging him to play, and taking him on fun outings. For DH, it meant that I willingly put down my phone to ask him how his day was or listen to his thoughts on our life and the direction it is taking. I wasn't constantly multi-tasking so I found it easier to see and compliment the qualities about DH that I fell in love with four years ago.

Feed "The Crazy" At Least Once Each Day

Now don't confuse "the crazy" with cocaine or something elicit. In my case, "the crazy" is my own neurotic love of organizing planners and list-making. When Wee-One went down for his afternoon nap, I did do a little bit of work for an hour, but after that, I gave myself permission to grab the printables I had taken with me and start planning. It doesn't always come to fruition, but just the act of writing down my thoughts/feelings/needs/anxieties cleanses my mind in a way that nothing else can.

Shower At Night

It was the strangest, most nonsensical habit I fell into while at the beach but it makes perfect sense. I spent most of the day swimming, walking at the beach, sweating, or whatever, and come the end of the day, the last thing I wanted was to go to bed smelly. A light bulb went off. I wanted to shower at night, then roll around with DH in the clean sheets, free from the filth of my day. It was perfect.

Turn Off The TV When I Go To Bed

For years, I got used to sleeping with the TV on or needing extraneous noise to go to sleep; however, a simple white-noise machine that I borrowed from my sister broke this cycle. I used her HomeMedics machine--the "summer rainstorm" setting, and fell asleep within 10 minutes of laying in bed. As a side note, the simpler the better with the bedroom design. The less furniture and greater the organization, the more quickly I relaxed.

Not every day can be a vacation, but there's nothing wrong with bringing a little bit of that mentality home with you. I hope you can use some of the tips I've outlined here, and please let me know if you have some of your own.

Happy reading,

Your Devoted Friend

When Life Gives You Lemons...

So, there we were...minding our own business, paying bills, making ends meet, and BAM--we're homeless. Hyperbole aside, it happened over the course of two weeks because our *dripping with sarcasm* super-cool landlord realized that he could rent the house for far more than he was getting from us. 

So, here we are...living with my grandmother in her upstairs apartment, desperately trying to save enough money for my Dear Man, myself, our beautiful baby boy, and our 3 dogs to get a new place.

At first, I was predictably upset and scared, but truthfully, it's not all bad. In fact, there are a few very important lessons I've learned as a result of this upheavel:

1. Stop romanticizing and buckle down
2. Income minus future planning equals "actual" income
3. Enjoy each moment for what it is, not what you want it to be
4. "More" makes you tired, not happy

Lesson 1: Stop Romanticizing and Buckle Down

While we were living in our rental property, we behaved as though we were going to live there forever. We didn't overly worry about savings, we made repairs to the house out-of-pocket, and we planned for a life we couldn't realistically afford. Our finances--and our dreams--needed a harsh wake up call. Ideas do not equate to ownership, and are useless without a solid plan to achieve your goals.

Lesson 2: Income - Future Planning = Actual Income

Yes, what you just read is correct. Dear Man owns his own "Start-Up" business for which he cannot yet take a salary, so we decided to only take my income into account. In the interest of transparency, my income is divided between 3 part-time jobs (preschool teacher, program coordinator for a local non-profit, and church nursery worker), and totals $2,200 for 10 months out of the year. The 2 months that preschool is on Summer Vacation, I only make $1,300 per month. 

What's the equation all about? I decided that we would pay ourselves first.

Right now, $100 per month will go to building our $1,000 emergency fund. An additional $400 per month goes to our standard 3-6 month emergency fund. Right now, Sweet Baby's savings account is comprised of all of our $1 bills and change that we scrape together and deposit at the end of every month. Doing the math, that means we don't have $2,200 to work with, but rather $1,700 ($800 in my Summer months). This is a big shout-out to Dave Ramsey and David Bach who outlined simple, logical, doable plans for the Average Joe who wants to live without financial fears.

That's Us!!!

Lesson 3: Enjoy Each Moment For What It Is

Fun and relaxation are now an important, and coveted commodity in our home. Whether we're talking about a free community event, or a chance for a family outing to the grocery store, it's not just the mindless spend-fest it used to be. Our son is 11 months old--big and beautiful--and all I want is for him to grow up happy. So maybe some of this living in the present is related to guilt that we feel, but who cares? In the end, he's only going to see how hard his parents worked, how grateful they were for the work, and how much he is loved.

Lesson 4: More Makes You Tired, Not Happy

My typical day before we moved consisted of taking my son to Preschool with me, having my Mom watch him while I went into the non-profit office for a few hours, pick up my son, cook dinner/play with Daddy, put Sweet Baby to bed, and crash. Guess what? Nothing's changed, except for my attitude. Now I care and appreciate the time with my son, the work that provides us with money for food, and the family that has supported us through our challenges.

Working towards shared family goals (financial or otherwise) is energizing!

We take great pride in watching our debt decline, our savings increase, and our lives declutter. Each month, we grow stronger as a family and take a few steps towards the future we want.

CHALLENGE: This week, think about whether or not you are putting your family first. If you aren't saving the way you want, is there a bill you don't need? If you don't spend enough time together, is there an activity you don't need?

Thank you for reading.

Sincerely,

Your Devoted Friend